The Midnight Sun
by lindenrosetps
Summary: The midnight sun can be a trying time for everyone... the Dragon Hunters must eventually succumb to it. As well as Hiccup. WARNING: I was about as tired as they are when I wrote this. Expect insanity.


"HICCUP!" Viggo pounded his fist on the table angrily, then overturned his Maces and Talons board. Metal pieces scattered everywhere and rolled into the corners of the cabin. "How does a one-legged _runt_ keep ruining all of my plans?"

"Maybe he's smarter than you," suggested Ryker. He immediately wished he had kept silent. Viggo flung one of the players at his head.

"Shut up, brother," he snarled. "I… I need a plan. A master plan. Something that he'll never see coming."

"Hopefully it'll work better than the last few."

"I need…. I need…" Viggo stood up and began to pace the room. "What do I need? I need… CELERY!"

It was the time of the midnight sun, and neither of the Grimborn brothers had slept all week. Clearly, it was beginning to show.

"How is _celery_ going to help?" snorted Ryker.

"They're teenagers! They _never eat their vegetables!_ " Viggo rubbed his hands together eagerly. "Oh, it's going to work this time. I'll frighten them off that island again, with vegetables!"

"I think you should use beets, personally. They leave horrible stains."

"Leave the thinking to me!" barked Viggo. "Celery! Hiccup will never see that coming!"

-.-.-.-

"Hiccup, are you alright?" Astrid squinted at her friend.

"Me? Of… of course!" Hiccup spun around on his prosthetic and nearly crashed into a wall. "Why wouldn't I be alright?"

"When was the last time you slept?"

"Oh, I dunno. Days. Weeks. Who knows?"

"Uh huh. It's starting to show. Stormfly made me take a nap yesterday. I think it's time for yours."

"Sleep? Why would I need sleep? I'm fiiiiine!" Hiccup gave a laugh worthy of Dagur and tripped over a piece of metal. Toothless caught him before he could hit the ground, giving an anxious rumble.

"I really think you should rest."

"I can't rest! I've got so many ideas!" Hiccup scrambled for a piece of paper and began folding it. "Look! It's paper with _wings!_ It's dragon paper! We can send the Terrible Terrors after it!" He flung the paper at the wall. It did a loop in the air before settling onto the floor, causing the boy to nearly collapse with laughter.

"Hiccup…"

"DRAGON TOYS! WE NEED DRAGON TOYS!"

Astrid facepalmed. "Oh, gods."

-.-.-.-

"Celery! It's brilliant! We need a large supply of celery! And catapults!" Viggo paced the deck of his ship, cackling gleefully.

Ryker, meanwhile, was kneeling next to an empty cage. "Why do they do this to me, brother? Why do they _always_ do this?"

"Snap out of it, Ryker, we need more veggies!"

"They're always leaving me!" Ryker began to sob, holding his head in his hands.

"Those were Terrible Terrors! We're Terror mailing! VEGETABLES! Those Terrors were supposed to leave!"

"You stole them from me!"

"They're coming back! We're finally going to take out the Dragon Riders!"

"What is the point of we don't have our Terrors? What's the point in any of it?"

"VICTORY!"

"TERRORS!"

The Hunters looked at each other, not sure if they should be amused, frightened, or disturbed by this exchange.

"Where will this battle lead us? Will it ever end?"

"It's going to end now, with my celery!"

"What will become of the Archipelago?" Ryker rocked back and forth, still staring disconsolately at the cage. "When we conquer everything what will there be left to do?"

"For the last time, we're business men! We're just trying to get rid of the dragons!"

"And then what? When we do that, then what? There will be no Terrors, Viggo!"

"Nonsense, we'll keep one. But where did you put the celery!"

"For the last time, beets! You need beets! Be-he-heets!"

-.-.-.-

Hiccup crumpled a piece of paper and tossed it into the air. "Come on, Toothless! Get it!"

Toothless glared at him and rumbled warningly.

"I'm trying to make dragon toys. You're not helping."  
"Hiccup, I don't think the dragons need toys." Astrid put a hand on her hip and looked at him, trying to figure out how in the world she would get him to bed.

"Of course they do! Don't you, bud?"

Toothless shook his head emphatically.

"Dragon blade! I should make more dragon blades!"

"Hiccup, no."  
"Who wouldn't want a flaming sword?" Hiccup gave her a crazed grin. "Bring on the Monstrous Nightmare gel!"

"No way you're going anywhere near fire in this state."

Toothless gave a rumble of assent, nudging Hiccup anxiously. Hiccup patted his scaly head and laughed. "But fire is great! Hey, where are the twins?"  
"Oh, no. No twins. Bed."

"But we could have so much fun…"

"Hiccup, really."

"Oh, you're right. I should test the Dragon Fly 3! It sparkles!"

"Not a chance."

"You're no fun."

"You need rest."

"Nah. I need… uh… Gronkle iron clothes! They can match Toothless's armor!"

"I don't think that's going to work very well."

Hiccup gave a hysterical giggle and began spinning around. He didn't stop until he toppled onto the floor. "Oh, hi Astrid. Look! It's spinning! It's like a dragon ride!"

-.-.-.-

"Fine, if you want to have it that way!" Ryker stomped over to an empty cage and threw the door wide open. "FLY! BE FREE!"

"Ryker, there was nothing in there except butterflies! Why aren't you focusing on the celery?"

"BE FREEEEEEE!"  
"CELERY!"

Ryker had begun to sob again, pounding the deck of the ship. "It's not my fault that there's no vegetables on this ship! And I'm telling you, beets!"

"Celery tastes far worse!"

"At least Terrible Terrors don't eat it!"

"They eat fish, you moron! They don't eat beets either!"

"What are they talking about?" one of the Riders whispered.

"No idea," another answered. "Just roll with it."

"We should deliver the celery on a Gronkle!" cried Viggo. "A celery carrying Gronkle!"

"Obviously it should be beets and Terrible Terrors!"

"No, a Gronkle!"

"But beets stain!"

"Look, we'll use both the celery _and_ the beets!" announced Viggo. "You can never have too many vegetables!"

"That would be perfect if you hadn't lost all the Terrible Terrors!"

"WILL YOU FORGET ABOUT THE TERRIBLE TERRORS ALREADY? THEY'RE. COMING. BACK."  
"VIGGO!"

"RYKER!"

-.-.-.-

"We need a toast machine!"

"A what?" Astrid glared at him. This was getting out of hand.

"A toast machine! A machine that _makes toast!"_

"That's what the fire is for, Hiccup."

The world will use this one day!"

"Whatever you say."

Hiccup ran over to a chest and pulled out his spare prosthetic. "Astrid, I've got it! I'm going to make the leg fly!"

"Okay, _what?"_

"It'll be amazing! It can have wings and firepower and it needs a matching boot, of course…" He grabbed a piece of paper and began doodling something that looked suspiciously like Chicken wearing a hat.

"Hiccup, you do realize that that's…"

"Zoom!" Hiccup began "flying" his leg around the room, grinning like a maniac. "Whoom whoom!"

"Okay, that's it. Come on, Toothless." Astrid took the leg away from Hiccup and guided him out of his hut. She pulled him into the dome, pulled the cover off of the tunnel, and nodded to the dragon.

"Astrid, what are you doing?" Hiccup was suddenly wary.

"Toothless?" Astrid gave Hiccup an innocent smile. Then the Night Fury nudged Hiccup from behind, sending him into the hole.

"Astrid! I thought you were my friend! And you too, bud!" Hiccup gave a loud yawn. "So… many… ideas…"

The next sound they heard from him was a quiet snore.

"Oh, thank goodness," sighed Astrid, replacing the cover. Suddenly, some airborne projectiles came down on top of her, causing her to duck for cover beneath Toothless's wing. "What in the world…" she muttered, picking up one of the missiles. "Are these… vegetables?"


End file.
